I'll be on crutches for 3 months in my apartment, which is on the 2nd floor in a non-elevator building because apparently I don't have the ability to see into the future. So naturally I thought I should try and get the place in shape so that by the big day, things would be organized. Ready. Prepared.
If you'll recall, I had a very long list.
The first thing I did was place the paper cutter on top of the HD box, next to the TV, in case I needed to trim off the speakers of the TV or cut the glass in the paintings above it to make coasters. I'm practical that way.
Those are some of my trademark papers on top of the paper cutter, so maybe I should cut them into little square shapes and stick them between 2 pieces of the cut glass when I make those coasters, thus giving my guests something to read while I bore them to tears about my surgery and ask them why they didn't bring me
flowers painkillers. Hey, I'm not wasting my time over here.
I also painted this wall. Crutches hate an unfinished wall.
Then I organized my office so that I could find everything at a
year's moment's notice.
Those albums are half of my scrapbooks and photo albums from my long, illustrious life of working two weeks a month and complaining the other two.
And last, but not least, I thought it might be nice to organize my back bedroom closet so I could easily get to all the clothes I wear
over and over and over . That grey suitcase has been there for over a year, filled with framed portraits of dead family members I never knew. I guess they're from my family. They might be dead family members from one of my Dad's 4 wives. EXCELLENT Feng Shui by the way. One of the last things on the list is to figure out how to balance a plate of food on my head while walking with crutches but other than that, I think I'm making myself crazy progress. I'm thinking of making a dress that is entirely made out of pockets.
Or maybe tying Zorro's hat to my head? But only if Antonio Banderas comes attached to it. But then I'd have to keep Melanie Griffith occupied and you know what a pain she can be. "No Melanie, I do not have any spare collagen and syringes sitting around."
End of chat.