Monday, September 08, 2008

Mailbag # 8


This is the eighth installment of anonymous snippets from emails I've received. Click on the label at the end of this post to read the others. Or not. If you recognize your line and want to out yourself, go ahead. Or not.


I've been trying not to go on blogs at work at the moment just in case I get fired one day, they can't use my blogging as an excuse.

I was just at an indoor play-place with my wife and kids and none other than Britney Spears was there with her brood.

I love shoving you up things!

But if you're fucked up and depressed...it's those pills. They are so insidious. First they make you feel so good. Then they ruin your life. Typical relationship.

Some guy my husband works with was stopped for speeding the other day on his way to work. While the officer was talking to him, the car’s engine died. The cop asked "What's wrong with your car". The guy answered "It ran out of gas". The cop said "Well, you can go then." So the guy walked the rest of the way to work.

You have always done me the courtesy of telling me personally to fuck off as the need arises.

Can my love be bought so cheaply? Why yes it can.

We are broke right now.

Never mind that I had the shit beat out of me everyday when I was a kid for as long as I could remember. I died during child growth.

I adore your titanium ass and the thong you wrap it in.

How many personalities can he have?

I can cross the street without fear of being run over by a car.

Now I'll have to be an adult. Doesn't that suck?

I have never been able to stand that guy- never even read him- he’s just creepy to me.

Did he show you what shoes he was wearing? Because a quick unbraid of the pigtails and we have DOROTHY! ding, ding, ding.

I should have worked for the FBI.

End of Mailbag

9 comments:

  1. Heh, other people want to shove you up things.

    Heh!

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  2. I love mailbag. What a weigh-in on the state of things. I like the one about, now I'm going to have to grow up finally. I keep saying that. Doesn't seem to be instilling much maturinty in me, though.

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  3. Too funny. Any chance of seeing the rest of this one?

    "I adore your titanium ass and the thong you wrap it in." That's original!

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  4. Your mail bags are my favorite! Not only because I am included, but because the other emailers are soo funny.

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  5. Your mailbag makes me realize that I don't get nearly enough good mail.

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  6. I got an email from a friend the other day that included the phrase "twat waffle" and "apparently, I am growing a penis!" I immediately thought of you and the mailbag feature.

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  7. Ah, you definitely have more interesting friends than I do...

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  8. That dude was probably driving so fast so that he would get to work before he ran out of gas.

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  9. I love them all but my favorite is

    "Never mind that I had the shit beat out of me everyday when I was a kid for as long as I could remember. I died during child growth."

    Ha ha!!

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